Transformers 3

This movie is, without a doubt, the most fun I’ve had in a theater this year. I saw the movie in 3D, which was a good idea.

The plot is kind of muddled and doesn’t make much sense, but from what I got out of it, way back in the day an Autobot ship escaped Cybertron, but crashed on the moon. Some important Americans you should have learned about in history class flew up into space, explored the crash site, and left. The ship was carrying the former leader of the Autobots, and some kind of robot bridge that would have saved Cybertron and won the war. After Optimus Prime learns that his former leader is up on the moon, he gets angry at the humans for hiding it from him. They rescue the robot, revive him, and some bad shit happens. I can’t really give much else away because that would be giving away some major spoilers, sorry. Just know there’s a lot of plot holes, some questionable things that somehow don’t follow the other two movies, and Leonard Nimoy plays the lost Autobot leader. Also some of the humans in the movie were working with the Decepticons the whole time, and Chicago gets destroyed.

However, I don’t go into these movies expecting a plot or something that would make sense. I go in for giant robots fucking each other up. And you know what? That’s what I got. In 3D. Optimus Prime kicks serious ass in this movie, as does Bumblebee. There’s some new Autobots in the film, and we have no idea who they are or why they suddenly showed up. Some familiar robot faces also die in this movie. I’m a big enough person to admit I shed a tear at one scene. Over a CGI robot. The action scenes were pretty killer, and the human scenes were surprisingly really funny. This movie is by far the best of the three, which isn’t saying much since the entire franchise (including the cartoon show) was based around selling a toy. So, again, if you’re looking for the meaning of life in a film based around selling toys to 8-year-old kids, you need to get the hell over yourself.

Go see it. See it in 3D. Go see it with some friends, don’t expect any kind of plot, and enjoy this mindless summer film.

-Lauren

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